Another obit. And it hurts!
We lost a former prisoner this week. While it’s
not nice, it’s not really surprising.
Some of our friends behind bars are not in good health.
This death,
however, was particularly troublesome for me.
Could we have done more, or should we have done more? Not the kind of thing our consultant would
want me publicly sharing in a week when we’re encouraging year-end gifts.
Yes, I’m
struggling. You see, the world wasn’t supposed to be this way for Vivian.
Family and
friendship structures that should have been there for her failed, and lies and
hatred resulted in false claims of sexual misconduct.
A judicial
system that allegedly presumes innocence and that should have been there for
her failed, and she was found guilty and locked up for 28 years.
A state
prison system that allegedly cares for the individual failed her, and she had
to fight for appropriate medical care and compassion all the way.
A Parole
Board that claims to be fair in considering all factors for release failed her,
and denied freedom because she refused to admit guilt.
And even
after her release, two years later due to serious health concerns, a private
adult care facility, charged with caring for such individuals, failed her. Staff members in the cockroach-infested
facility mistreated and abused her.
Lest I make
this sound too dismal, there were a few rays of sunshine. Anne came into the prison system and the two
women formed a meaningful, lasting friendship.
HFP came on the scene a couple years ago at Anne’s request, trying to
help where possible. And her daughter
Dawn came to her side, and for the past several years became a tireless
advocate for her mom.
Even when
finally releasing Vivian this fall, the prison system couldn’t seem to do it
right. I’ll not forget Dawn’s note to me: I am so angry right now that the staff
couldn’t be bothered to make sure she wasn't cleaned enough to not cause her
whole bottom and back and private area to be bright purple and sore. Almost
like she wasn’t a person, so it wasn’t a big deal to let it get that bad.
I know she was sick. But damn. I can't believe what I saw
on her today. She shouldn’t have been neglected like this.
She finally
got appropriate care in an appropriate facility, but death followed shortly. We
lost Vivian on Tuesday. She was 63.
The problem
is, there are many more behind bars in similar situations, and they may not
have a friend or a daughter to help them bear the burden. That’s why it’s so very important for HFP to
remain strong and healthy. That’s why it’s
so important to tell this story. Says
Dawn: There is nothing fair for her in
this story. I could have kept her out of hospice and treated the symptoms she
had, and she would have ended up back in that shit hole of a nursing home. People who go to prison do their time and
are still punished afterwards. It’s
not right! I will do whatever I can so
another family doesn’t have to go through this.
In a day when
we are seeing so much division, scorn and hatred, we must be people of faith
and compassion, willing to speak up and insisting on humane treatment and care
for those behind bars…willing to support people and agencies who carry on in
this field. It’s not up to those guys. It’s
up to us!
It’s what
Dawn wants.
It’s what
Jesus demanded.
May the
story of Vivian serve as a constant reminder:
There, but for the grace of God….
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